Red Alert! Teacher on Overload!

Oh, Spot! You have no idea what awaits you when you return to the classroom on Wednesday! I have one hundred eighty days to teach you all sorts of things, but you know what ranks highest on the priority list?

You guessed it: Swine Flu! (Didn't we just end the school year talking about this?)

The teachers had their "big talk"/convocation today, and you know...the big story was how to wash those paws of yours! For example, when you lick those paws, do you slide your tongue in between your toes? Do you rub them side to side for a full five minutes? Do you dry them properly on the pre-approved towels? Well, I hope you do...because those swine/H1N1 2009 Fall Flu germs can last from anywhere between two to eight hours! So...that was my inspiration for today. It's gonna get me lickin' and scratchin' and watchin' you for the first signs of any malady whatsoever.

Here are some of the other topics discussed on your behalf today: global awareness, twenty-first century skills, strategic learning, differentiated instruction, positive behavioral systems, teaching core values, how to handle birthdays, how not to handle birthdays, approved snacks, how we're already behind China, but India is right there too, changes in technology that we have to plan for but don't know anything about yet, and changes in how children are raised that we're planning for but don't know anything about yet too. If that wasn't enough, we were able to come back and learn about power schools, global curriculum changes that we probably won't have time to teach and scheduling so that all learners can and will learn well...pretty darn well, we hope! I'm a little confused, Spot, if you can't already tell. But I will have it all together come Wednesday. And you know what, Spot? I will not do to you what was done to me today...because even though everyone was very well-intended and polite, they fried my brain on the very first day! We're gonna move a little more slowly there pup, so don't you worry. SCHOOL IS FUN...and we're gonna have a great time this year!

In Your Face!

Okay, Spot...it's coming, there's no denying that. I am starting to get the nervous-nelly-nightmares, my mind is starting to imagine myself crammed into the classroom with all twenty-four of you.

And today? Well...while you were out jumping in the pool, chasing a toad, and skipping around the neighborhood (doubt that, it was 100 degrees in the shade!), I was in school setting up the classroom.

And guess what! Promise not to tell?

I was excited!! I felt like that little kid that used to play school in the barn across the street. I pulled out the pencils, plastered a few posters up and spruced up the display case outside our room! Am I crazy? Well, of course.

I'm good to go until the masses make their way down the hall and the rumbling feet start to sound on the stairways. It's THEN that I really get the nervous-nellies...cuz then? Then I have to do something with all of you to prevent mass anarchy!!

So, get out there and buy all those shiny new school supplies! And hurry-up and finish your summer book (You ARE reading, right?). And I'll see you front and center in just 13 more days. (AHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!) I'll have had a nightmare or two at LEAST before then, I'm sure!

Close Encounters of a Sixth Grade Kind

Okay Spot, I know...it's R & R time. I'm supposed to be completely immersed in my book while sipping on lemon water and thinking about a dip in the ocean. But...then I spy a couple of elevenish/twelvish kids on the beach having a great time with a couple of skim boards along the edge of the surf.

I spot a couple of others digging a pit in the sand. Later, another pair is racing up the dunes toward the icecream man. Clearly, they are lost in the sun and the surf. They've shed the spoils of a school year long gone.

But...I catch myself thinking about the new pups headed my way this fall. And you know, Spot? I even got a little bit goose-bumpy thinking about it! But then...I shake my head side to side real quick--you know the way you do when you're trying to cast a nasty song out of your head? I do this because 1) it's way TOO EARLY. 2) It'll start up my pre-school year night terrors, and 3) I'll be spinning ideas/plans in my head all summer long! (And that's worse than the night terrors!)

So Spot, I bounced up, dropped my book and threw myself in the ocean. The tide was coming back in off the sand bar, so I had quite a workout getting out to the biggest waves. I stood on my tippy toes, jumped the waves and waited. When my dream wave formed, I was ready to ride it all the way to the shore. I paddled hard and rode that bugger all the way in...at the last minute colliding with a boogie board...and a little guy--just about the size of my soon-to-be new sixth graders. He bonked me on the head, but I didn't care. We both rolled up on shore and laughed. "Sorry," he said. "Don't worry about it," I said. I just shook it off and chalked it up. It was a close one...but I'm off the hook and I know that. Summer rules! And for now, I'm staying right where my feet are...planted firmly on a sandy shore! (But Spot? That new pup sure was a cutie pie...so in that, there's hope!)

One Happy Puppy

Okay, well...Spot, I'm right there witcha! Lovin' this summer mode. In fact, I'm just really getting there at this point--in my groove, caught up on sleep and livin' without a schedule! I try not to walk around smilin', but you know what, buddy? I just can't seem to stop myself!

Here are the ten top things to love about summer:

1. No papers to correct.

2. No papers to correct!!!!

3. I can sleep till whatever time I want!

4. I can sit in a chair and read a whole book...start to finish!

5. I don't have to plan for anyone else...well maybe dinner, but that's all!

6. I can wear the same pair of shorts for days and not even think about tomorrow's outfit!

(Less laundry!)

7. I can go hours without telling anybody what to do...Mr. Lynch acts up once in a while, just to make sure I stay in practice!

8. I live in the adult world...but I don't have to act my age.

9. I can spend an entire day listening to the birds and staring at the clouds, hanging out in the outside world.

10. I look around all the time, and realize just how lucky I am!

And...an unofficial addition--just because I'm not supposed to be thinking about all you guys at school, doesn't mean that I don't--I can laugh out loud sometimes at all the funny things that happened this past year, and nobody thinks I'm crazy. In fact, I have the job that keeps on giving...I see you guys sometimes at stores and church, and I just feel darn proud of the time we spent together.

I miss you Spot. Don't you think for one moment that I've forgotten you! But I'm loving this summer furlough!! And to all the people out there who are jealous of us teachers--I promise

I won't say "nana-nana-boo-boo!"...except of course to the Sarge, my old school secretary who is merciless about how EASY us teachers have it! We put our time in...listenin' to all your barking, watching you wiggle all over the place and correcting...correcting, oh my gosh, for HOURS and full weekends at a time! So, do we deserve this? Well, you betcha! ;) (And now let's just hope that girl takes a permanent vacation!)

More...Dream Principal

Okay, here I go, off to shop for the dream principal. I love my marching orders from all my friends at school:

1. He/she must...#1 GET IT: And by that we all know what they mean. They must understand the demands of the classroom in real-time, no BS theoretical stuff either. Usually the longer someone is out of the classroom, the easier it is to forget. NOT my last principal, and that's why we loved her.

2. He/she must...GET AROUND: Be visible. We DO wanna see you, and we want the kids to know you. It's hard to get them, unless you live in their midst. We want hands-on. Don't pass it off to us. We're in it together.

3. He/she must...Be kind, be an all-around leader--but know how to GET TOUGH, to hold a hard line as a professional in today's world. The lines have become so blurred. We need an advocate...a teacher/leader and someone who GETS IT in the parent world, the kid world and the teacher world too.

Anything you wanna add, Spot? I know, I'm eager too! We all want a good princiPAL. It won't be long now.

When the Teacher Gets the Flu/I'm No Swine!

Okay, well...who'da thunk it, Spot? The teacher gets the flu and they have to close the whole school. Well, no Spot, that's not why they're cutting off your year book signing, awards ceremony and all that end-of-the-year hoopla, silly. I don't want you blaming me for one more darn thing, there fella!

But boy, some of you guys (and girls) could've thought a little more about all this with all your advil-sneaking-coughing-all-over-the-rest-of-us behavior. You can't have a temperature and come to school on the same day, no matter what you do. Even if Tylenol lowers it. We're just one, big germ pool out there! Did you know I've been washing desks after school for three weeks now?

And no, we're not sure I have the Swine Flu. The doctor said no more testing to figure out which is which. The old-fashioned rock 'em, sock 'em flu is out there too, and he says it's worse this year than the swine. Oh, I know, the kids are having a good old time out there, Spot...I mean, Oink. But lasso 'em back in there, buddy...we gotta celebrate all the very cool things we did this year, but most of all Spot--we gotta savor our time together! It's almost day 183, let's have a good old time together! (If you have a fever...stay HOME!)

Did Somebody Say Kickball?

Well, Spot, you've been a great little puppy this year! You really have! We've just about covered everything in the sixth grade play book. After a year of trying to pin you down and get you to stay on task with your buddies, you snapped into place and got your work done in 30 minutes flat this afternoon! Could it be I've finally found the magic words?

"I just might be thinking about adding a 20 minute kick ball game to our day."

ADD? ADHD? I think not! Why didn't I think of this sooner!! It's the oldest trick in the book--bribery! It doesn't take the promise of a new gadget, a video game, or even a trip to the ice cream shop! A twenty minute kickball game. It's just good for the soul!